I took a trip to the eye doctor yesterday. When she started the exam she said, "I see you're complaining that you're having more difficulty with your vision. You're too young to need progressives. Let's take a look."
"You got that right, sista!" I said.
Well, she was mistaken, my eyesight has gotten to the point where I now need progressives which, by the way, I know will make me car sick since everything else does! I asked, "What about contacts?" She laughed, "When they make contacts for astigmatism, near sightedness and far sightedness, I'll let you know. Until then, you'll need progressives."
"Crap." And I mean it in the most upsetting way.
"Oh, and you have ... (big wordy word alert that I cannot spell nor remember) Something-Something Itis which is life long and will never go away. You'll need to wash your eyes each day in the shower with a little bit of Johnson's Baby Shampoo. Apply it directly to your eyes and rub gently."
"What? Did you just say directly to my eyes and rub gently?!" She's making things up now just to upset me. I know it.
"Also," she said, "you'll have to put these drops in your eyes 2-4 times a day....forever."
"Super." And I mean it in the most sarcastic way. Nothing like a cheery check up to brighten my day.